One of the hardest things to do is to understand the provisions of God. It can be hard for a man to let go of the controls and hand them over to God, but here recently it is a lesson that God forces upon me. March 13th, 2020, I came back to work from a doctor’s appointment and shortly after the HR lady walked into my office and shut the door behind her. I knew one of two things was about to happen, and I wasn’t going to be happy with either one.
She closed the door, sat down in the chair in front of my desk and her next words, was what I knew was coming. “I really hate this part of my job”. I immediately grabbed a box that was in the corner and began packing my personal belongings. She said that “they no longer felt that I was a fit for my position”. After 4 years without a single write up, glowing yearly reviews ending with me receiving $3000.00 + per year bonus’, I’ve never even received a verbal warning about anything, but here we were, suddenly I didn’t fit there.
I thanked my boss for the opportunity to work there for the past 4 years and walked out the door unsure of what was coming next. On the drive home I began to pray, Lord you closed this door for me, please open another, but that door never opened. This was the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic and people were losing jobs everywhere, no one was hiring, and still aren’t. At least not down here in Mississippi. I prayed and prayed but no answer came.
One day while on the verge of just losing all hope I heard that still small voice in the back of my mind saying God has got this if only you have faith and believe. I commenced to praying and fasting. I brought myself on my knees and cried out to God for my provision. I didn’t ask for money, or a job, or food, or anything in particular, just provision. I just asked that he take care of me and my family. Just as Jesus told us to do.
Matthew 6: 25-34
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
This is a tough pill for any self-respecting decent man to swallow. And I struggled with it a lot. Yet God has sent many people, one after another to me to aid me and to provide what I need. Craig James and Hunter Drew, co-founders of the FoE both gave money to me through a drawing of money donated, enough to pay my rent. Then enter Coach Joe Hart. Someone I’ve known on Twitter for a while. He had a passing in his family that brought him down to Mississippi where I live. We decided to meet up, to actually meet in person. This is something I can’t stress enough, making connections, but that’s for another article. Joe took me out and showed me exactly how he flipped items for profit on eBay. It took one day of training and then I was off. That was one week ago and as of this morning I am sitting at $2700.00 in sales. God has provided.
You see, there comes a time in every mans life where he must choose to trust God or not, and this comes when you need him most, and also when we are least likely to do it. I was broke, very little food, and lost my job. God said to me, trust me, I got you. It’s an incredibly hard thing for a man to do, give up the controls, but once you do, it’s incredibly freeing. I gave up the controls to God and I have spent the last few weeks on the craziest ride that I have ever been on. You should try it.
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