I’ve been working here for almost three years and they still haven’t given me the raise I deserve. The harder I work the harder the jobs they give to me. Maybe I should just stop trying. I can’t stop trying, that just wouldn’t be me. I need to just confront my boss about a pay raise. What if he says no? What if I ask and he says no and gives me even more work for even asking? I don’t know why he wouldn’t give me what I want. I’ve never been late. I always do more than what’s asked of me. I deserve this. Oh crap, there he is. Maybe if I just strike up conversation with him, he’ll mention more money. That doesn’t make any sense. Why would he just give me a raise? I need to address the situation right now before I lose this opportunity.
Does this last paragraph sound familiar at all? For you it might not have been trying to convince your boss to give you a raise, but it could have been any daily activity. Over-thinking has got to be one of the biggest self-sabotages that everyone of us has dealt with at one time or another. Sitting there going over every reason we don’t deserve something. We end up talking ourselves out of huge opportunities that really might just not come around too often. We tell ourselves the outcome might not be in our favor. Why would we want to act upon something if there is no definite yes on the other side? We think to ourselves that maybe if the outcome was a little clearer, we would take the leap of faith. Next time the opportunity comes around then I might just jump at it. All of this is just causing you to feed into the monster that overthinking is. Every time we don’t act upon a gut feeling it will only continue to make that leap even more frightening.
This over thinking starts to build a world out of things that are safe. You become stagnant in the in the murky waters of mediocrity. There seems to be no way out. Taking that first step outside that comfort zone will be scary as hell. I know I deal with overthinking daily. My whole life I had continually over thought just about everything you could imagine. The first time I even thought about asking my boss for a raise I had built it up into something that almost seemed rude to ask. Rude? Yes, I had tricked myself with over thinking so then I thought it would be rude to ask for more money. By the time I finally asked my boss for a raise in the moment my voice started to crack, and I was sweating profusely.
If you put things on the table and stop over thinking about them, they will either get solved or not. At least by throwing the idea, thought or whatever it is out there you will take so much stress and pressure off of yourself and those around you. It’s time to stop thinking and it’s time to start doing.